The Beyonce Bump (not that one, the other one)

“Travesty: Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie being reduced to the lowly status of “Beyoncé’s favorite author/feminist.” – Maame ‘Dimples McGee’ Owusu Baafi

By now you’ve seen and heard all about it. An excerpt of the TED talk given by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie was sampled by Bey on her song Flawless/Bow Down. When i did a search for ‘Chimananda’ and ‘Beyonce’, google spat up 478,00 results.
(That’s 477,999 too many,if you ask me). The tone of these articles are all the same. How excited and proud Chimamanda must feel to be on Beyonce’s radar. As though she has only truly arrived now that she is the beneficiary of the Beyonce driven increase in popularity ie the ‘Beyonce Bump’.
And to that i say, kindly, respectfully GTF all the way OOH! Yes i’m quite sure a Orange, Booker, Commonwealth etc etc award winning author, ascendant to the literary throne of greats like Soyinka and Achebe is just jumping for joy at having been featured on a grammatically deficient and phonetically scant song that asks that you “bow down bitches!”
If i roll my eyes any harder, ill be permanently blinded. Mtcheeeeeew.

Don’t get me wrong, i find Beyonce to be relatively innocuous. She is a great performer of songs written for her, and dance moves choreographed for her. Then the Beyhive showed up and proclaimed her the ‘King”(????). Then she decided she was a feminist. Mild side eye from me and i kept it moving. But now she has crossed the line. Keep Chimamanda’s name out of your mouth Beyonce! Come back when you’ve done the education! You don’t have the answers, Bey!
I bet a million worth of bit coin that Beyonce has NEVER even READ one of Chimananda’s books. I bet she asked her assistant to google feminists, and find her a ‘cool’ quote to copy/paste into her song.This is what counts as being a feminist in 2014.. to say you are, and prove it by quoting an actual feminist. (The Suffragettes weep)
*Sidebar: You know whom i think are actual faces of the modern day, cool and accessible girl power movement? Tina Fey and Amy Poehler. If you prefer your feminist to be more buttoned down, you have Hilary Clinton and Michelle Obama to look up to.
**Side sidebar: Funniest thing i ever read about Margaret Thatcher, and the notion of her having broken the glass ceiling for other women.” Only in the sense that all the women beneath her were blinded by falling shards. She is an icon of individualism, not of feminism”  Ouch, Russell Brand, ouch! 🙂

Let me not digress. The fauxminist movement is a topic for another day. Right now i am here to reiterate that Mz. Adichie did not need this endorsement in the first place, and the mere notion that she should somehow be grateful for it is insulting. Yes, western media. You prefacing every mention of Chimananda’s name with Beyonce’s favourite is insulting, and diminishing of her many achievements.
She is not a lip gloss, facial cream or a vegan dish..some product to be tried out. WE already know who she is. You will not “Kelly Rowland” this woman!

I could go on, but i shall stop here. Happy Chimananda week, and if you haven’t already check out the other Chimanada themed posts from Wednesday:
My (not) review of her latest book Americanah.
And her wonderful article on the Nigeria anti-gay law “Why can’t he be like everyone else”.

Have a lovely weekend 🙂

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