One Ring to Rule Them All/ A Cinderella Story




About three Sundays ago, i was driving to the pharmacy when a car shot out into the road in front of me.It was either swerve into the oncoming lane, or attempt a hard stop, and i decided to swerve (as the road was free of traffic). Naturally i was furious, and as i went round the car, i threw some choice insults out the window.
I was sitting in the pharmacy car park trying to find my lip gloss when i notice that the same two men from the car had followed me there, and were now approaching my door. I will not bore you with the details of what happened next, but it was a doozy.. A sample exchange:
Man: You prostitutes, you go sleep with rich men for money and they buy you cars, and you come into town and think you are somebody
Me: Oh, you mean like your mother?? You better get the eff away from my car door before you REALLY annoy me!
HA… it was a mess… ten minutes of pure foolery. When they left and i finally made it into the pharmacy, i was shaking. The female attendant there were trying to… console me i suppose, by saying dont mind them, etc etc. She said that only a week prior, a taxi driver had harassed a woman in the same manner,calling her a prostitute among other things.And that the lady  had defended herself by waiving her left hand in his face and saying “Im married“. Now the conviction with which the attendant uttered those last two words, suggested that she too felt that it was a “checkmate, fool!” moment. And i looked down at my own empty finger, and i realized what was happening.  Yet again, I was unable to harness the power of the One Ring.
Ladies, if you would like to operate in this society of casual misogyny and sexism, the One Ring is a MUST. How else are you going to prove to people that you are not a whore?
At the workplace, no matter how many degrees and years of experience you have, how else are you going to get people to address you with respect and not treat you like a secretary on Mad Men?
How else are you going to get your mechanic, air conditioner repairman, painter, etc to stop hitting on you, when clearly, men within your own socio-economic class have left you unspoken for, so you must be desperate and willing to settle?
How do expect your extended relatives to not look at you with sadness at family gatherings? Even when you say you are in fact perfectly happy?
How do you expect low life cowardly and abusive men to stop bullying you if you cannot say with confidence ” my husband is on his way?”.
How can you conquer without the power of the ONE RING TO RULE THEM ALL?


There is a T junction on the way to my house that i use at least once a day.
There is a rather large pot hole in the road, right at the intersection. Now, the pot hole is quite easy to avoid, as i have mapped out with my amazing diagram below. (A). All you have to do, assuming you are the green car, is just… drive as normal.

Diagram A

Diagram A

And yet every, single time ive been at that intersection, this is instead what ive seen. Red car behavior.(B)  If its ten cars infront of me, they ALL do it.

Diagram B.

Diagram B

Its hilarious to me.. unless im the blue car that day.. then.. refer to part one. LOL
However, I cannot for the life of me understand it. I keep asking myself.. is this what it looks like when you have a flawed education system that favors rote memorization over critical analysis? Are people just blindly mimicking the silly taxi driver that they saw do it first? Yo no comprende.
Since im all about silver linings,though, i intend to use this situation to solve my ring problems. I am going to go down to that intersection in my sunday best with water, snacks, a comfortable chair and a parasol. The first driver i see use the green car method, i will chase him down and offer my hand in marriage, because  that is a man who is going place! 🙂

And thats it folks… if you have One Ring experiences, id like to hear em.
Also, Musings is now on facebook, so dont forget to like, and tell a friend to tell a friend.
Enjoy the rest of the week xx

7 responses to “One Ring to Rule Them All/ A Cinderella Story

  1. Fiona, I can see how the ring will help you survive in some situations but for the most part people don’t even acknowledge it…


  2. Pingback: No one man should have all that power. | Musings at Midnite·

  3. Pingback: Desperately Seeking Sanity | Musings at Midnite·

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