Crazy in Love

I was 17, and walking with a friend, when i heard someone frantically shouting, trying to get my attention. In a bid to look cute, i had left my glasses at home, so i couldn’t see who it was. I stood and waited, but when the figure got closer, it was a man i didn’t recognize. “Ive been looking for you”, were his first words.

Me: Oh i’m sorry. You’re confusing with me with someone else. I don’t know you.
Man: NO! Its you. I saw you in the market. I was trying to call you, but you didn’t hear me. But now I’ve found you. I’m Fexy.
Me: Umm.. yeah.. ok.. well i have to go now. *i start walking away as he protests*

When i got to my car, my friend was extra animated. She had recognized him. Turns out Fexy was well know in Tema for having gotten hooked on drugs, which scrambled his brain. She advised me to steer well clear of him.
A week later i get a phone call. Much to my surprise, its Fexy, calling to tell me that it was his birthday,and God had revealed to him in dream that was his gift and true love. Jezors! I tried to find out how he got my name and number, but just he kept talking. Naturally i asked him never to call again, and instructed everyone in the house to automatically say I wasn’t home if he called.

Fexy called about 20 times in the following three days, and then….. nothing.So i was again in shock when the unnamed ”visitor” who was ”waiting at the gate” per the house help turned out to be him. I lost it. “What do you want in my house?”, i screamed. “You need to leave!”. And he did, but not before forcing me to take the envelope he’d brought along. (It contained a long letter, with references to Romeo and Juliet,destiny and  love at first sight.It was insane.) Instructions were updated. NO Fexy. Neither on the phone, nor in person. At this point, my mother started asking questions. Just what was going on with this Fexy? Nothing, i assured her, but i was shook. He had found my house!
From then, he would show up, and be turned away, so he started leaving letters with the neighbors watchmen and gardeners. Much to their irritation, i refused to take the envelopes and insisted that they throw them away or give them back to him.
Then one day, as i was walking over to my friends house, Fexy materialized from behind a tree. Like a damned ninja.
“Why wont you leave me alone?”, i shouted, surprised at how trembly my voice sounded. “Because we are meant to be together”, was his matter of fact response. And so he followed me, ten paces behind. I’ll never forget skin crawled the whole way. I kept looking back hoping he’d be gone, but he’d be staring back. I hurried into my friends house, and when i was ready to go, begged my mother to come pick me up.
Eventually Fexy took to coming to the house each day in the morning, and just sitting on the curb outside for hours on end. I could see him from the window. I felt like i was being driven mad. I stopped leaving the house altogether.
When, i couldn’t take it any longer, i went to my Dad. If you know my father at all, you’d understand that this was a desperate move, because he is NOT. THE. ONE. He is an old school African parent, with no patience for rubbish.

Me: (in actual tears): Daddy someone is stalking me. I need your help.
Dad (lowering his newspaper slightly): Nonsense. *long pause*  What do you mean?
Me: I mean someone has been harassing me. Calling the house, sending me things. For a month now.
Dad: What did you do?
Me: Oh?! I didnt do anything! I don’t even know him. He is crazy.
Dad (unconvinced): You must have done something. *mumbling* Instead of reading a book….
Me: Daddy please. I can’t even leave the house, because he is sitting there.
Dad(perking up considerably):Eh?? You mean there is a man sitting in front of my house? As we speak?

Those were the magic words. Nobody sits aimlessly in front of Dr. David Kwame Ansah Asiedu’s house. Nobody. You will automatically be labelled a potential thief. lol. Just how bad of an idea is it to loiter? My father went to his room, and emerged with a loaded double-barreled shot gun. On some Terminator Then he walked to the gate. I couldn’t even bear to watch from the safety of the window, and i dared not ask what happened with he went outside, but i tell you what…I NEVER saw Fexy again. The END. 🙂

If you have your own story of a ‘love gone terribly wrong’, id love to hear it!
Until then, i shall leave you with these  two new afrobeat tracks dropped just in time for love weekend. Enjoy!

R2Bees- My Song (Paedae really outdid himself this time. Beware.)

[audio  ]

Davido- Aye (video link)

[audio  ]

7 responses to “Crazy in Love

  1. Hahahahaha hihihihi. Fexy sure got what was coming to him big time. Kwasiasem!!!! Love too be by force? lol . Great piece again Fi


  2. Hmm, its Ghana police we are talking about here. They act lackadaisical about murders, how much more being harassed by a “wee smoker”. lol.
    Thankfully though, as you said, my Dad thinks he’s Rambo, so alls well that ends well.. 😀
    Thank you for reading!


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